I hear frequently from parents about how to keep their children from fighting with one another.
Yes – if there are siblings in your family – you have probably faced the squabbling, the teasing, the hitting, the taking toys away, the “you can’t play with me” woes of sibling rivalry.
So what is a parent to do?
I always love the answer to two siblings who are about to share a piece of cake. One child immediately says “I get to cut it” wisely planning a bigger piece for himself. But instead… backfire … the parent decides then that the other child gets to choose which piece he wants first.
When sibling conflict is happening at home, most parents’ first instinct is to get involved – stop the behavior – set down the rule. However, from what I hear, in spite of this, the conflicts don’t often stop there.
Sometimes constant fixing and stopping and accusing from the adults in the child’s life leads to more aggression and bad feelings from a child who is actually in need of more positive attention. If you notice one child is on a negative streak with his/her sibling, that child could very likely be feeling insecure in his place in the family – and may need you to help him feel more connected.
Touching base individually daily with each child – if only for a few minutes – shared listening, playing, laughing, eye contact can often be the best medicine for making sure a sibling cup is full.
Also, playing games where siblings team up together – like chasing Dad- or being timed to see how fast they can get all the toys picked up – shows them how playing/laughing/working together can actually be fun.
For sure notice the caring side – when you see a helpful sweet gesture from one to the other – mention it – as we all know what we notice most is what we see more of.
There’s nothing better than growing up together as siblings – learning how to get along, to share, to laugh,to love.
All while avoiding family feuds.
EXCEPT : Not The La Crosse Family Feud presented by The Parenting Place, on October 17, 2018 at the Weber Center for the Performing Arts. Doors open at 5:30 PM for social time/the Feud to follow. $10 pre-sale admission/$15 day of. Dinner included/ Cash Bar. Buy your tickets at The Parenting Place, Festival Foods, online, or at the door.
This is a family feud you’ll love!